Do you have a hard time saying no? Does your love ones constantly over step your boundaries? Do you struggle with being honest about your feeling because you don't want to hurt someone?
Healthy boundaries allow us to honor ourselves and our needs, support healthy interactions and communication in relationships, and empower us to set limits when needed. There are different types of boundaries, including physical, sexual and emotional; and they can range from being rigid to fluid.
Boundaries differ from person to person with taking a persons culture, personality, and the social standards into consideration. Setting boundaries defines our expectations of ourselves and others in different kinds of relationships. Setting healthy boundaries is important for self-care and fulfilling relationships.
How you began to set boundaries:
1. Reflect and identify your needs
It is helpful to reflect on different areas of your life and assess whether your needs are being met. If there’s a part of your life that feels exhausting, difficult, or draining, it might be time to set a boundary there.
2. Plan a response and consider outcomes
Setting a boundary is a process and can be daunting or stressful initially. Try to navigate barriers and calm your worries by considering how others might respond to this boundary and how you will react. If someone challenges you, how do you want to respond? If someone is unable (for whatever reason) to respect your boundary, what do you plan to do?
3. Communicate your boundary
Once you’ve identified your needs and thought through a response, it is time to communicate your boundary with the person or people involved. When communicating, be respectful, clear, assertive and firm in your approach. Know that this can be the hardest part and it takes practice, so don’t be hard on yourself if it feels difficult.
4. Notice the impact
As you go through this process, notice if the boundaries you are setting are leading to the desired outcome. Remember that boundaries can be adapted as needed and can look different in different relationships.
Last step if not able to resolve on your own,
Talk to Someone
If you find yourself still struggling to set healthy boundaries a therapist can help you.
A therapist that can help you navigate these feelings and how to change your harmful thought patterns and behavior.
We would be happy to help on your journey towards healing. If you’d like to explore therapy, please contact our office to schedule an appointment.